IT'S MY LIFE

By: Bon Jovi

That's it. I'm so tired of living timidly, surrounding in my own fears.

It's true, God has given me one life... and I feel sad looking back for the last 23 years and I had done nothing, seriously nothing in my life. I was carrying such sad life, and I want no more part in it.

It's now or never, I know what I should be doing now.

Stop the hatred...

I surprised myself for starting to like running now!

The last time I was being over-dramatic by crying over a small remark my mum said about my weight, I cried my eyes out for 1 hour straight when my mum stood by lecturing me about ... everything actually.

That happened a month and a half ago. And truthfully, I'm so grateful my mum scolded me hard, otherwise I'd still sat around pitying myself.

One thing she said that still stays with me until now was that the more I hate something, the more I need to do it. There's no point in crying and giving up. If I fall, stand up again, and again, and again. I told her... mom, I hate running. Please don't force me to run because I hate hate hate it. And she only replied... you need to do it then, and more of it. You won't hate it as much.

At that moment, I despised me mum, and vowed never to run, because I hate it.

But guess what... now I'm beginning to like running, after spending some weeks running (little by little, I started by burning only 100 cal, ran for 5 mins and walked for 10 mins or so.) The last 2 weeks or so I was finally able to up the running scale. Recently I can run for 15 mins straight, burning 400 cals in the process. The most amazing thing is that as soon as I stopped forcing myself to lose as many cals as possible and simply tried to enjoy the act of running, I ended up enjoying it!!!

Me, enjoying running?! I've hated running for so long... but now, now... it feels great to run :D.

That feeling of sweats pouring out from every pore of my body, and that of accomplishment by giving it my all, is so amazing!!! Now, I'm sort of addicted to that feeling that only exercise can bring.

Now, I think clearer, have more energy throughout the day, feel very positively, esp. about my body, have more confidence because I believe I can push myself further. All from the hard scold my dear mum gave to me that one day. So if I can give one advice... that would be: listen to your mother!!! She knows what's best for you.

Yes, I want to lose weight badly. But now I'd stopped thinking about it, only wanting to be as healthy and fit as possible. I'm aware of what I put into my body, and enjoy running and exercising now (I also do yoga, it's a lot of fun too :D). Who knows, by the end of the year I might be 30 lbs slimmer though I'm not too stressed over it, with the way I'm going right now, I believe I will lose weight. We'll see but it's not the goal I'm interested in, but the journey now :). To all of you trying hard to lose weight, start small. You'll get there eventually. Don't compare yourself to others. You're wonderful being who you are, just believe it. And like I said, when you fall, stand up again because you have a lifetime to change. Things will get easier the more you do it. When you hate something, acknowledge it, and let it go, let it go. Hatred does no good to a person. It's so much more free to let go. Once I let go of my fear/hatred for running, I was free and was able to end up enjoying it. See... it's not so hard.

Coffee House :)

This is what I've been watching: Coffee House.

I adore this drama.

You take one crazy writer + one silly secretary who makes the worst coffee in the world + one sexy/successful but lunatic publisher + lots of weird hilarious antics and you will have the basic ingredients for Coffee House. Even the main descriptions said that this drama is about a love triangle, so at the core, this is a true romance, but with a lot more comedy than the average Kdrama. Plus, the sexy/established lead this time isn't a devil girl out to ruin the angelic girl and the main guy's relationship, nope, sorry. She's strong, successful, driven and witty!!! This time around, we have a modern girl who knows what she wants and goes after that, who doesn't sit around weeps pitifully for her poor life and waits for the rescue from a rich powerful man. Everybody is likable in this drama. And am I glad to find that the main lead is not another clueless/poor but kind-hearted heroine who captures the heart of a rich man based on her hard work and heart of gold. This time around, the story explores a different kind of relationship, one that has established long before the drama takes place, and goes deeper to unravel all the secrets the relationship holds that prevent the two main leads from accepting one another. It's so refreshing to be able to watch a Kdrama (beside Alone in Love which is still my absolute favorite) that portrays human's emotions realistically. I'm already at the 10th episode mark and still loving every minute of it :). For now, please enjoy this little MV that has some tidbits from the first 8 episodes:

Cổng Mặt Trời's (Sun's Gate) first impressions

Cổng Mặt Trời (Sun's Gate) is one of the better Vietnamese dramas I have seen in a long time. I wouldn't go so far as to call it the best, because the scripts aren't quite as strong as I'd have like it to be. However, despite its length of 67 episodes, the drama went by quickly, and that was a good sign, proving how addicting this drama was. Sun's Gate drew a wave of young Vietnamese audience back to the TV screen, away from their usual routine of watching Korean/Chinese dramas. The story is simple, it's about a group of 12 young adults in their early twenties going out into the world, with their struggles, tribulations, failures and successes. Yes, there were 12 main actors for this drama, and most of them got equal screen time. The success of Sun's Gate goes back to the story, it's very Vietnamese. The dialogues, the interactions, thoughts, everything was purely Vietnamese. This drama didn't try to imitate the trendy dramas from Korea or HongKong or anywhere else in the world. It was funny, heartfelt, genuine and authentic. With its sincerity in depicting lives of these Vietnamese students from a purely Vietnamese view, no attempt to imitate or use cheap trendy gimmicky situations to draw the audience in, it actually succeeded. The beginning was so hilarious it left me in stitches from laughing so hard, and every time I remember about the drama, I couldn't help but smile. A good Vdrama worthy of recommendation!

Angel in Me

Final exams and projects are really killing me lately. Ayda... Found a good song, but I'm more in love with Thao Trang's vocals more than anything. I remember being impressed with her voice back in the day when she was still competing in Vietnam Idol the first season. I personally think she's better than Phuong Vy, the winner of that season. Thao Trang has quite a unique look (being mixed I believe), an excellent voice, and her English is not too bad either. I'm looking forward to hearing more from her.

Angel in Me

Sung by: Thao Trang

Thinking of God

REVERSE THINKING

Thought I would share this because it truly is inspirational. Credits to Mark Awtrey.

Spring brings smiles and comedy!

I'm watching 2 Korean dramas (they are both romantic comedies) at the moment after of like... what, 2 and a half years of not watching anything. The last Kdrama I enjoyed was Dal Ja's Spring, and that was back in 2007.

The 1st one I'm watching now is Oh My Lady! (picture above) starring Chae Rim (she's one of my favorite Korean actresses, I love love her in Dal Ja's Spring!) and SiWon (don't know much about this dude beside the fact that he's a member of the Kpop band Super Junior and uhm, seems like every girl is in love with his smile and chocolate abs, I honestly don't see the appeal though). Five episodes in and I'm slowly warming up to the series. Okay, this drama has got a really trite storyline and is full of Kdrama cliches, but it's entertaining enough. I wouldn't call it a good drama as of yet, the characters are likable enough to pull me through. I really like Chae Rim so chances are that I will finish the drama. And up to this point, I'm starting to see the chemistry between CR's character and SW's, and you know, for a rom-com, chemistry is everything. I'm really glad the chemistry is beginning to show :D.

The second drama I'm watching is called Personal Taste, starring Yeh Jin (oh, I so love her in Alone in Love, that's the drama that made me love her... though I only like her in that drama so far, the rest of her other dramas are just uhm, not interesting to me :D) and Min Ho (first time watching him act, I know he was in the oh sooo popular drama of last year Boys over Flowers, but oh well, I don't care for that drama at all, but dang, he's such a hottie! Now, he's what I call a real charmer, his smile, aww, and he's so tall and, and, well you get it, hehe...). Entertainment value-wise, this drama owns the other one. It's wittier and funnier, and the characters are more likable. I'm enjoying the storyline here a lot more, albeit, the storyline is nothing that spectacular, but it's light and pluffy and does not take itself seriously.

All in all, so far, 2010 seems to be a good year for drama watcher. I'm also eagerly awaiting 3 new spring Japanese dramas and 2 Vietnamese dramas (hey, Vdramas are improving!) And the lesson learned... oh well, it's good to have an open mind about everything. I used to compare so hotly Kdramas and Jdramas, I hated Kdramas for a while when it was so popular. But it was silly of me. Now that I'm a little more mature, I realize that each country has its own formula for winning their audiences, and the cultures make their stories different as well. As viewer, I certainly benefit from this broad varied entertainment, so yea, I stop hating and learn to enjoy them all for their own merits. And my drama watching experience is so much more fun (sometimes enriching too for I learn new cultureal lessons through the dramas :)).

Food for the soul

Currently, my soul is feeling very unsettling and stormy, but I've learned to take things easy. With that said, the best thing I could have ever learned recently is this rediscovery of God and his love for me, as well as my role here. It's a little abstract to explain right now. Hopefully as time goes, I can follow this new calling... And I also read something so beautiful it brought tears to my eyes. It's a pity it's in Vietnamese as of now though, still I want to share this with all of you who could read Vietnamese:

Tuổi Thơ Tôi

Người ta thường nói trẻ con bây giờ sướng…

Tôi chẳng nghĩ vậy, bởi tôi thấy mình sướng hơn.

Tuổi thơ khó nghèo nhưng tôi thấy Chúa thật gần. Tôi thấy Chúa qua đôi cánh mỏng con Chuồn Chuồn, qua chiếc lá Mắc Cở e ấp xếp lại mỗi khi tôi đụng đến…

Tôi mê mẩn từng con bọ tròn bé tí đủ màu đậu trên lá chè. Rồi cả đến con Nhện Tàu với hai cạnh nhọn cứng, nằm giữa màng tơ được thiết kế tuyệt đẹp, ngắm hoài cũng không thấy chán.

Tôi luôn thấy kỳ diệu về thiên nhiên quanh mình! Có thắc mắc gì đem hỏi mẹ thì đều nghe: “Tại Chúa làm nó như vậy” thật giản đơn mà đầy đủ!

Tuổi thơ tôi… những buổi chiều gối đầu trên cỏ, thả cho trí tưởng tượng bay vào những đám mây. Tôi có thể thấy cả một tòa lâu đài đồ sộ với mái tròn tròn, chẳng mấy chốc, tòa lâu đài biến thành gã khổng lồ đội mũ, rồi gã to lớn đó cựa mình biến thành chú chó bông. Cứ thế… biết bao lần trong những năm tháng ấy, tôi ngủ thiếp đi giữa mùi cỏ mà trên cao “màn ảnh rộng” Chúa ban cho tôi vẫn không ngừng chiếu.

Tôi yêu tuổi thơ tôi với những nỗi sợ dễ thương. Có buổi tối thò tay ăn vụng cái bánh của bà Ngoại, bên ngoài trời chớp sáng, tôi điếng người thầm nghĩ “Thôi rồi! Chúa chụp hình” Bỏ vội chiếc bánh vào miệng vừa xin lỗi Chúa vừa đỗ thừa “…tại bánh ngon và tại con thèm quá”

Tôi không thấy Chúa, nhưng thiên nhiên quanh tôi khiến tôi cảm nhận rằng ở đâu cũng có sự hiện diện Ngài. Trong từng lá trúc đêm trăng, từng tiếng thông reo trên đồi… đều nói lên tâm hồn của Chúa.

Tuổi thơ tôi vậy đó, quà vặt là trái ổi, khúc mía trong vườn. Búp bê là cái gối ôm có đội mũ, mặc áo, mang quần, và trong tay tôi “em” được ôm ru chẳng khác gì một em bé. Tôi cầu nguyện khi bé gối bịnh, tôi ẳm bé đi nhà thờ… tôi làm đủ mọi thứ trong một không gian nhỏ xíu dưới gầm bàn, mà niềm vui thì lớn cho đến nỗi bây giờ tôi vẫn còn cảm nhận được.

Có những buổi tối ở nhà một mình, hãi hùng bóng đêm với tiếng lá xào xạc bí ẩn…Tôi lại cất tiếng hát lớn “Đừng sợ chi… hãy tin Ngài…”

Tuổi thơ thật đẹp đã sưởi ấm lòng tôi khi mỗi ký ức đều đong đầy đặc ân của Chúa

Tôi yêu thích tuổi thơ tôi, cũng có những buồn tủi, nước mắt… nhưng đặc ân được cảm nhận sự hiện hữu của Chúa đã bù đắp cho tất cả. Đến nỗi … khi tôi suy nghĩ về trẻ thơ ngày hôm nay, tôi thấy chúng thiệt thòi trong môi trường hiện đại.

Con tôi, chúng thấy gì trong thành phố lớn nhất nước này? Nhà cao tầng, dây điện, xe cộ, phố xá… Có mấy trẻ chịu từ chối phim hoạt họa hấp dẫn để nhìn mây, nhìn trăng?

Khi ngắm hoa trong bình nó hỏi “ai cắm hoa đẹp thế?” Nhìn cây lá trong công viên nó hỏi “ai trồng cây này?”

Xưa, tôi nhìn đâu cũng thấy Chúa. Nay, con tôi nhìn đâu cũng thấy người.

Người ta thường nói trẻ con bây giờ sướng … Tôi chỉ biết lặng thinh. Và tận trong sâu xa tôi thấy mình nhận nơi Chúa trách nhiệm phải giúp con mình nhìn thấy Chúa trong cuộc sống. Làm sao cho chúng hiểu rằng khi bình minh lên rực rỡ, mọi người chìm đắm vào công việc cho đến khi hoàng hôn xuống, cả bầu trời đều thay đổi màu để con người được nghỉ ngơi… Và cho dù ai có làm gì… thì ở một nơi nào đó Chúa vẫn đang lặng lẽ vận hành, điều khiển và chăm sóc chúng ta bằng tất cả tình yêu của Ngài.

Tôi yêu tuổi thơ tôi…

By: Thy Ca (from Hoithanh.com)

Appreciation...

A GOOD DAY

Lunar New Year!!

Phut Giay Giao Thua

By: Dan Truong, Cam Ly, be Trieu Vy

So Vietnamese Lunar New Year is coming up, and watching this very sweet

commercial takes me back to some sweet memories of when I was still

in Vietnam. I just realized that I so very miss Vietnam, after being gone

for almost 10 years now. Ahhh... I wanna come back >w<...

So precious...

Today has been a precious day. It rained a good deal this morning, and snowed a good deal as well from afternoon until now, the weather very well puts me under a melacholic mood. Just yesterday and several days before, depressive bout of thoughts didn't leave me even for a second... I cried myself to sleep, to awake this morning feeling light and refreshed... as if a heavy cloak of dark clouds had finally lifted. Everything appears precious to me, even the little act of driving in the rain, to catching glimpses of snow falling outside of the windows as I sat working on my assignment, to seeing my parents back from work, to cooking spontaneously a fried rice dish... Then I know... I had been too hard on myself. If only I had looked a little bit closer to what really matters. I couldn't see it then, and suddenly, a revelation came, not from careful analysis of self-introspection like I always do, but from simply allow myself to live, to breathe in the moments, to experience everything as it is and as it comes. We humans are strange, and much stronger than one is able to give credits to. Perhaps, this feeling of tranquil happiness is just that, a fleeting moment of revelation, and the next day, stress and unhappiness will again take me captive... even so, I am happy just as I am now. Isn't that life? We struggle just for that brief moment of happiness? Let me be selfish for a little bit then... because yes, I am selfish, it has always been my weakness. But I'll keep trying to conquer it... because there will always be another better tomorrow.

Favorite manga introductions!

It is often not discussed on my blog, but I am a big manga lover. Not an obsessed fan that follows and collects all the titles that are put out on the market (nor am I fortunate enough to have the income to do so ^^), but I am more the type that reads and experiments with a lot of lesser known works, as long as they pick my interest.

I started counting my manga collection yesterday night out of boredom. Guess how many I have accumulated since the summer of 2007? 279 volumes! That's a lot more than I had expected, not that it's a bad thing :D. One thing though, many titles reside on the shelves were impulse purchases. Ahh, here come the memories of a golden time when I still had plenty of money to waste on buying bulk manga set on Ebay. That 2007 summer alone I must have acquired roughly 3/4 of all the volumes I have right now... And if I really talk about money, one manga costs averagely $10, and I have 279 books, that must make the amount I spent on money roughly about $2800!!! Even though, truthfully speaking, I bought most of them cheap... some dirt cheap like the whole 14 or 15 volumes of Firefighter! Daigo of M Company for like $20 total. And the series turned out to be amazing!!! I couldn't have been happier ^^. I stopped collecting for like 2 years due to financial crisis and the close down of the only cheap place I bought manga from, lol, but ever since I discovered the new&use link on Amazon (yes, I am very ignorant of a lot of things around me), I knew that I could finally resume this habit of collecting.

Too many scattered thoughts...

The diary I ordered from Korea finally arrived. It is such a pretty diary, though a little bit smaller than I'd imagined.

As you can see from the picture above, it came in a tin box, with a sheet of index stickers and a PVC cover to protect the diary from wears, stains, water, whatever you name it.

Everything about it spells high quality and I'm very happy with this purchase.

The illustrations are also very cute and endearing!

This diary is so precious that I almost don't want to write anything in it, in case I destroy its prettiness. Yes, I know it's ridiculous -__-;; but I can't help it!

Korea and Japan produce some of the cutest things on this tiny planet, I tell yah!

I am bewitched by their products all the time... ah, my wallet is weeping right now.

My mom is always puzzled over my obsessions with cute things, and keeps on telling me to 'grow up', but she just can't understand my joy whenever I come across a lovely illustration, a unique product, a stylish design *sighs*...

It's something that I don't think I'll ever 'grow out' of.