Omg, I hate having free time >_____<;

Am I turning into a workaholic or what?!!
The reason for me being away from the blogging scene for a whole week was because I was super busy with school and works, yes, expected excuses... For three days I spent many hours completing and perfecting my cups and bowls and sculptures for my ceramic class. I was very pleased with myself when I finally got them done, no, make it tremendously. During time like that I feel productive and useful, my mind totally locked into a working mode, my concentration put into high gear and I just kept on rolling and rolling... unaware of my surroundings. When I came back to reality, things seemed a little out of perspective and just simply... unfamiliar somehow. That's what always happens after hours and days of working for me, be it for a painting, a sculpture or a design work; I feel out of touch, and sometimes a little withdrawn. It usually takes me days to get back to being social again, no matter how much I dislike being so. It's like I'm being programmed to act this certain way, and my mind just fails in making it out differently *sighs*. Well, this is Thanksgiving week, so I guess I should put all the emo and sentimental thoughts out of my mind and really start to look at the good blessed parts of my life. God loves me and has given me a really happy life up until this point... Whatever bad things that happened only helped to make me a stronger individual. I learned so much this year; it's the year that I fell in love, experienced heartbreak, re-evaluated my values and principles, seriously faced failures in school, lost friends that I treasured, parted with my very bestfriend, saw more of the world, came to appreciate and accept my true self and my family... It's the year that I grew more mentally and emotionally... I'm not very sure about the spiritual part. Even though this is the year I faced a lot of difficulties, it's also the year my heart and mind strayed farther away from God than ever before. But I don't know, the more I try with my own strength, at the end of the day, I just feel drained and empty. It's like losing some parts of myself. Days after days I remind myself to smile more, to be strong... it's still like just a chant to make myself feel better. I do everything for... me. It's so selfish, isn't it? It could be this very reason that from time to time I feel displeased and unhappy. I'm expecting too much out of life for just ... ME. Instant gratification, immediate attention, I want love... but I guess I have not really loved with my heart. And God saw that... I have a lot more to learn, don't I?

Now that I have some free time at last, I just don't know what to do *laughs*. Well, it's not like I don't have anything to do, it's just that... I find it harder and time-consuming to get start and finish on something else... Ironic, isn't it?

This afternoon before my art history class I had some time to rewatch one of my favorite movies: Il Mare starring the 'sassy girl' Jun Ji-hyun and one of my fav. actors: Mr. charming Lee Jung-jae. There's also a US remake of this movie in 2006 called The Lake House starring the very cute couple in Speed: Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves. Both versions are good, though personally I love Il Mare a lot more than its US version. Il Mare, being the Asian version, culturally and traditionally hits more at home for me. Its quietness and calming pace lead me deeper into the very lives of these two established career-driven yet lonely individuals, whose solitude lives make viewers emphatize and yearn for their meeting even more than they themselves. The plot can be a little confusing as it involves a little of time travel. The story goes like this (according to Wikipedia):

The story begins with Eun-joo moving out of a house by the sea called "Il Mare". As she is leaving, she leaves a Christmas card in the mailbox, asking the next resident to please forward her mail to her. Sung-hyun, an architectural student, receives her card, but is puzzled, since he is the first resident at "Il Mare" and the card is dated 2 years in the future. After a series of back and forth correspondences, Eun-joo and Sung-hyun realize they are living 2 years apart, Eun-joo in the year 2000 and Sung-hyun in the year 1998. After some testing, Eun-joo and Sung-hyun discover that the mailbox at "Il Mare" is enabling their communication and they can pass objects through it.

... and thus begins their time-transcending love.




What I really love about this movie the atmosphere it portrays, and its emphasis on the two main characters. Here you have a lonely girl Eun-joo moving into a new apartment with her dog Cola whose she found at Il Mare, the house on the sea in which she was the last tenant. She lives alone far away from her family, her only friend and confidant is a comic book store owner that seems to be asking Eun-joo to watch the bookstore for her whenever she's out and about with her boyfriend more than spending time with her. Her boyfriend is oversea and never calls her. She is quiet at work and doesn't seem to be the type that would joke and make connection with people. And here comes the other character: Sung-hyun, an established architect with a grudge with his father (we're never given the reason why actually, it remains a mystery until the end, but oh well, it's not like we need to know for the movie to work, XD). He's now the occupant of the house by the sea, and being the male version of this movie, he is in fact, a lot more alone than our heroine. There's no confidant, even though he does hang out with his coworkers occasionally and has a friend from college around. His crush (and possibly love?) left him to go study abroad. I don't know, to me, Sung-hyun seems much more lonely and reserved than Eun-joo. He does mostly everything alone: cooks, eats, exercises, plays, etc... well, there's still Cola, but you know what I mean. With the backgrounds like that for the two main characters, we as viewers couldn't help but long and desire for these two aimless and clueless souls to get together. Or at least, I was like that the whole time. I enjoyed so much seeing their interactions, even only through messages. Obviously, the man has to suffer more, lol. It's sort of unfair in a way, but it works, and it makes the film a lot more romantic. I ached for Sung-hyun way more than I for Eun-joo. He makes sacrifices and commitments, all for Eun-joo while she accepts them and still quivers with confusion whenever troubles arrive and her expectations not met. Or perhaps because she's a woman, she expresses more and that's why we viewers see more of her weaknesses. Still, Eun-joo is the more energetic one who initiates activities and contacts. You gotta love a girl who takes charge, lol. This film shows the differences between the two genders quite well. Even though it's not a movie to be focus on that aspect. But I couldn't help but smile when I see Eun-joo confining with her friend about her problems while Sung-hyun throwing himself to work alone; Eun-joo telling Sung-hyun directly about what's been troubling her and he gives her advices on what to do while Sung-hyun never really says much about his problem with his dad until Eun-joo finds out and reaches out to help him when he's down. Overall, it's such a wonderful romantic film. It's a film that emphasizes true love that waits and respects. The whole movie our main characters never truly meet each other face to face and know that, not until the very end. It shows a much more respected and reserved love in my opinion and I love it. Love doesn't mean you have to get to see a person everyday, get to see him/her naked and have sex or to be around with that person when you're lonely. It's much more than that. Love endures and respects and stays with time. Well... that's what an ideal love should be for me, lol. Of course, it's different for everybody.

The original MV of Il Mare, the song is called Must Say Goodbye



And here's another version, a fanmade one (it pretty much has the exact same scenes but with a different song, it's still a very good song selection though):



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A sudden doll obsession?!... Oh no (>,,<;)a ... I frequent Blythe doll forum quite a bit as of late, but Blythe dolls don't attract me as much as these Lati dolls. It's that melancholy look of them that appeal to me a lot. But they're hella expensive and can be hard to find so yup, for now, they're just a dream to me T^T; Who knows... one of these days I could be crazy enough to get one girl, hm...

For sure though, I shall get to own one of these adorable Ddung dolls from Korea, lol. Aren't they such cuties, not on that elegant sophisticated level as those Lati dolls but they have a much more sweet and innocent feel about them, and they're cheaper to afford to, hehe...

*sighs* it's another very long post... maybe I should stop putting so much ramblings into one post. I tell you, my thoughts wander a lot. Well, I hope you have a happy week, and remember to be thankful always. Love <33!>

Feeling artistic...

DOMO-KUN finally made its appearance here at Target!!!! When I first saw the ads at Chi's house yesterday, I literally jumped with joy! I love that little guy, but buying oversea is usually expensive. I'm soo soo glad it made its way over here :D. Gave this little girl in me some joy at the end of the day *winks*.

That aside, I'm currently crocheting a scarf at the moment, learned this new pattern on YouTube (youtube is like a lifesaver, it makes learning so much easier). Hopefully when I'm experienced enough I will try making an Amigurumi (Japanese crocheted stuffed dolls)!!! It's amazing what the Japanese can come up in term of 'kawaiiness' :-P. Look below for a whole lot of cute crocheted dolls, beware the cuteness, ack, my teeth hurt from too much sugary fluff that image offers, lol.

I also attached an image of my bento lunch number 2 :). I had a lot of fun making it, but boy, it took a lot of time as well. I'm here thinking what must it be like for Japanese mothers who are responsible for packing lunch for their kids every morning and making sure that they look great at the same time. Imagine the pressure for those moms who don't really enjoy the art of bento packing, hm... Either way I got more bento boxes that I haven't used yet, so maybe in a very near future I'll try doing another one ^^;

Bad hair day...

Daniel Powter - Bad Day

*sighs*... such a sweet song, always cheers me up when I'm down. Wish my life could have some unexpected moments like at the end of the clips though, still here wishing, lolz ^^;

Alone in Love...

I proudly present you: ALONE in LOVE, my favorite drama of all time :). No kidding.






It will be no exaggeration when I said that this drama is my favorite of all time. At least, for now, it tops all the ones that I was fortunate enough to watch. I have a pretty dry taste for entertainment in general, enjoying seeing everyday life happenings and character developments above all else. Yes, I love to submerge in the emotions conveyed in a particular take, to feel how a character feels and to lose myself completely when I watch something. Alone in Love delivers all of what I need in my entertainment and much much more. The drama is realistic, and very character-driven; and luckily, the characters in this drama are not only charming, but they are real, just like someone out there in the world. I see fragments of myself, of the people I know lurking somewhere in these characters. Watching this drama is like hearing and seeing problems from friends I've known for a long time. When the show ended, I literally felt withdrawn and empty, like I'd been forced to part with a very dear friend... there was this surge of sadness that was very hard to express in words.

Based on a Japanese novel called "Love Generation", Alone in Love indeed feels very Japanese. The pace is calm, serene and introspective. There is absolutely no over-the-top events or actions. Alone in Love makes the mundane of everyday life not only dream-like, but beautiful and filled with wonders.




(this entry is a work in progress, I'll update it when I feel like adding more...)

The wind in my hair....

Ahh, so it's autumn already... Autumn, does anyone in the US even use that term to indicate the 'falling-leaves' season of the year? It does sound strange to me to put that word down when most of the time I just use Fall like most Americans do. Hm, you gotta love the American way of abbreviating pretty much everything when it is possible, makes life easier :). Only that life cannot be that simple or easy, lol.

Well, just put it simply, I can't believe it's already November -___-; Time does fly, doesn't it? Around this time last year, I got to know my ex-boyfriend and had some fun with him studying together and organizing a surprised party for be' Heo (Huong). Speaking of them gave me some fond memories, though the time I know my ex was brief, I do appreciate the time we spent together. And be' Heo... I already missed her a lot. She obviously is having a lot of fun in Saigon as she told me in her messages. I'm so gonna bug her to get me some cute stuff over there, lol. I'm somewhat successful as she promised to grab some CJ-7 plushies for me, Chi and Tien XD. Good lord, aren't we just a bunch of kiddies (^^)a.

Yesterday was such a tiredsome day. Chris, this one guy at work wouldn't stop bothering me. I like him as a friend, we joked around a bunch but to me, that's just it. Chris, on the other hand, thinks there must be something more on my side. I'm always very cautious (think, EXTREMELY, lol) about the friends I make and want to hang out with, especially when it's guys that I don't know much about. He asks me to hang out lots of times, and I feel weird to keep saying no everytime. But the thing is... he doesn't have a car. So this somehow automatically gave me this vibe that he's just using me to have transportation for going out and having fun. Okay, maybe I'm TOO sensitive (which I think I am), but still... isn't that a bit on the convenient side? One morning he would text me out of the blue, and then when I reply it takes him forever to reply back without giving me any reason why. Hm... well, I guess I just might ignore him for now until I have to see him at work *sighs*.
Also, yesterday was the day that my ex contacted me after we broke up more than a month ago. It felt weird to talk to each other again after what happened. He came to my workplace to give me this huge box, saying that it was a thank-you gift from his aunts (I did some graphic works for their store in Kansas). It's really nice of them to remember me.


While we're on the talk of Fall and November, my brother's birthday is coming up!! Uh-oh... and Chi's birthday as well -___-; and then it will be Thanksgiving and Christmas, meaning more gifts exchanging and such. And then my trip to Cali... It's gonna be hard to save up. I'm thinking of crocheting a scarf for my bro and cooking him some food, as long as there is food, I know for sure that he will be happy, lol, such a piggie that he is :D (a cute big-bellied one, awww). As for Chi, argh, I probably will make her a pillow or some sort of phone charm, there's already some crazy ideas running in my mind ^^.

By the way, it seems like I will always have things to add to my wishlist. While I was on my quest searching for more designer toys, I came across some awesome European sweatshirts by this brand called Umsteigen and gosh, my heart immediately yelled 'Me want, me want'... What I like about them is that they are very different from the generic sweatshirts most would see on the market, they emphasize on colors and texture designs, as well as put some twists on the collars and hood to make them different from the conventional sweatshirts. But then, again the prices are not soft at all, ranging from $115-$125 (o.0). Ahh, any kind souls would love to buy me one for Christmas, lol XD??

Woah, this entry is getting loooooong... and I haven't really finished what I wanted to talk about. Oh well, I'm tired and my Art History class will start pretty soon, so time to wrap up and start packing for class ^^a. Later, then!!!

Food, PopArt, Tokyobay, yeah, I'm rambling....

A first entry always is difficult for me to compose as I am not very good at introduction. I'm pretty excited to tell what I've been up to lately through pictures so screw the pretentious introductory standard-ness many blog writers feel so obligate to begin their blogs with, I'll just go on with the meaty details now. However, my writing is getting so bad (as in horrible grammar, poor vocabularies, awkward sentences, etc.) as of late that I believe it is time for me to practice writing more. It used to be much easier for me to express myself, my emotions through writing, but now, I don't think I can say that anymore >__<; However, all this self-criticism is not important now, because this blog entry is not gonna be about how I'm gonna improve my writing skill, or how I should treat myself, blah blah... well, undoubtedly those issues will come up one way or another in the future, but as of now, they are not welcomed. So, let's start with... bento!! Bento is a Japanese term for what normally is known as packed lunchbox. Lately, bento packing has become tremendously popular in the US. I've always been very interested in bento ever since I saw beautiful beautiful pictures of well arranged foods by the Japanese, organized and packed so delicately in tiny bento boxes. But I didn't persue the subject more until I came across a livejournal community called bentolunch and that was when my interest had transformed into something more. I wanted to do bento, to get into the art of food-arranging, and to eat healthier. Since a bento box is tiny, it forces me to eat less, and to practice portion control. Below is the image of my third bento lunch, I was pretty proud of myself even though the face I was trying hard to make didn't really look like a face, but whatever, I had a lot of fun making it and that's all that matters. And I'm proud to present Kiki the clumsy and overly curious kitty you see roaming over the food below (^__<;)a

I have some more bento pics to post up later in other entries. Too bad I haven't been making much art with bento lately because I'm currently on a very strict diet, one that I signed up with SparkPeople.com (to ensure that I will keep at it and won't give up half way again, there's plenty of motivation there at that website which is just what I need to keep up with my goal of losing 16 pounds before Christmas) that generally my packed bentos just look very unappealing because my food choices are limited to mostly just Cheerios cereal for breakfast, some lean meat and rice or bread together with some fruits and veggies for lunch and dinner that I don't even feel bothered to capture them. But hey, once I lose 10 lbs, I will reward myself by packing a beautiful bento lunch again, you can count on that, well, only if I make it, lol. Inability to follow-through has always been one of my biggest weaknesses, so I make it a goal to reward myself whenever I make some positive progress. Beside packing lunch, I offer myself an ownership of a TokyoBay watch as a Christmas gift if I could ever make it to the wanted weight, which watch I don't know yet... but I'm leaning more toward the ones that are on sale, lol. Yea, I'm broke as a bum. My three favorite watches from Tokyobay are below. I'm really interested in Candy, but boy, it IS expensive for a poor college student like myself.

Lately, I'm really into PopArt and designer toys. When I was in Barns&Noble last week, I was very lucky to get a hold of Hi-Fructose magazine volume 9, an art magazine that talks about under the counter culture. I was so excited to see the magazine covering artists I'm really interested in like Audrey Kawasaki, Kukula, Amy Sol, Brian Despain, etc... and it also talks about many many other artists whose works are just simply AMAZING!! I'm such a weaker when it comes to beautiful artworks. Once December comes I'm a definite subscriber to this magazine. Why not now you might ask, well, simply because if I subscribe now I might get another volume 9 which I don't need a duplicate of and there is no option on their main website to let me select which volume I want to get start with. It's all okay... Hi-Fructose made me addicted to the point that I have been bringing the magazine to work just to be able to read and scan through the images when I'm on break.

By the way, since we're on the issue of magazine, I'm also very interested in Giant Robot magazine, it uhm, talks about Asian Pop Culture and Beyond, sounds very appealing to me since I'm Asian myself. Any comments on this magazine? It's a bit cheaper than Hi-Fructose, 6 issues per year as compared to 4 issues of Hi-Fructose per year. But since I have not seen or touched Giant Robot, I'm a bit hesitant. Well, I figure I'll keep a look out for this for a while.

Well, I have more to talk about but this blog entry is getting long and I'm getting very sleepy. It does not help that I have to wake up early tomorrow for my ceramic class (throwing anyone? I suck at that, it frustrates me to no end T___T, I guess ceramic is just not for me, period.) Next entry I'm gonna talk more about designer toys, my venture into the world of PopArt, probably some old designs I created and clothes, lol. Have a good day, everyone!